12:10 am – as i sit down to write this i have no idea what i'm going to say or how to format this free write since no one does this in real life and most of the people will be like 'what the fuck is this shit?' and then click away from this blog possibly never to return. but why does that matter to me anyway – hahahahaha in this stupid movie we're watching called the ugly truth the male lead just told the female lead to 'eat the hot dog real slow because men like watching penis shaped food go into girl's mouths' that's a pretty good line and i'm not usually one for crude humor, but that works – also i just noticed a product placement in this movie for Sprint it seems like there's product placement in every movie now except period pieces and movies about the holocaust which is a period piece jim – damn, you're an idiot. i heard the term arm-candy for the first time today with concern to some rapper's girlfriend – i like it. i gave a social media workshop for a client today it went really well i know way too much about this stuff and explain it fairly well and break it down to simple concepts. damn i'm suddenly jonesing for cuban food. i miss the ocean. i feel like i'm running out of things to say or whether i'll really publish this raw internal dialogue at all but now it seems like my fingers are going by themselves and my kids are in the next room sleeping and i think they're the best things i've ever done in my life and really that's all that matters to me even though i'm the disciplinarian i'm ok with that because i do love them so and i never even liked kids before we had some of our own. they grow fast. don't let anyone tell you differently – which no one does because everyone says they grow fast you never hear people say kids grow slow but really they grow proportionately to time passing it's really just a cliched way to say i really don't spend enough time with my kids and i keep looking over at them and they've grown a new adult tooth or they're going to need a training bra in a couple of years or you wonder whether or not the shoes you got them in spring still fit them in the fall. they don't by the way because they grow too fast. and love is fleeting and there are seven dogs years in every human year and dogs don't live long enough. but the beach stays the same no matter what unless you're on a NC beach in which case they let you build right on the sand with no dunes and sure enough a tropical system comes through and everyone's like 'what the fuck happened to my house on stilts?' i'll tell you what happened – life. we say nature of the beast when really it's just nature of nature. cliches suck. so do puns. i fucking hate puns but sometimes they're useful because they reach so many people and really when you're in advertising and you're trying to talk to so many different kinds of people at once puns sometimes work – only those are the kinds of jobs you want to get done and get paid and get out from. my laptop is dying with each keystroke and i need a new macbook but am a cheap bastard and will milk this machine as long as i can – i could keep going here but i can't because it's late and we have soccer all day the next two days which means i'll be keeping stream-of-consciousness in my head like i do every. single. day. it's so fun being me. 12:21 am

Song of the Week - Mountain Man
Trust Me

Jim Mitchem

Writer. Father to daughters. Husband. Ad man. Raised by wolves. @jmitchem on twitter. First novel, Minor King, out now.