Our oldest daughter is eight years old and entering the twilight of her innocence when it comes to Santa Claus. She still believes, but you can see logic starting to creep in. I blame fractions. She’s known as the fraction queen in 3rd grade. Math – it’s like hemlock to fruitful imaginations.
I’m sure some of you will say – ‘But Jim, mathematicians have to think creatively to solve complex science problems, design architecture or create new fragrances for DKNY.’ Indeed they do. But science is not the dark Christmas Eve sky that she stares up into hoping to spot a red blinking light.
When she was born I was on the fence about whether to let Santa be a part of our lives. I was equally concerned with deceiving her as subjecting her to the idea of Santa as a replacement for the true meaning of the holiday. And of course there’s the commercialism. However, my wife is an ardent traditionalist and so I was only on the fence for like 10 minutes. Eight years later, I’m ok with Santa. Even now – at the end of the innocence.
So we’ll drink in all the lights again this year. We’ll sprinkle oats on the front porch for the reindeer on Christmas eve. And we’ll tease the kids by making them wait in the kitchen on Christmas morning while my wife and I check out the living room to see if Santa really came. He will have, of course. And we’ll deal with what happens next – next.
Everything changes. Everything ends. And if we’re lucky, we get to relive the good things more than once.
Merry Christmas. And if for some reason you can’t muster the imagination necessary to enjoy Christmas through the eyes of a child – try squinting.
***
Kidgman
Dec 14, 2009
I think Santa is that one pleasant link that we have to our days of innocence when we still could be fooled by a magician’s slight of hand, or slept with a night light because of the monsters under the bed. Seeing a child’s eyes light up at the mere mention of Christmas and Santa still makes me get choked up. I guess I have three years to go yet with my little girl. It won’t be long before the cycle continues when the grand-kids start to arrive!
Rebecca McCormick
Dec 14, 2009
This bittersweet time in your life begins a series of events which mark the maturation of your precious daughters. When my son’s curiosity about Santa provoked his questions, we began by reminding him of a recent visit to Disney World, where he held Minnie Mouse’s hand and skipped around a flower bed.
“But did you really skip with Minnie or did you skip with someone dressed up as Minnie?” we asked, pausing. “Yes, you did skip with Minnie – because Minnie is a real character. But in order to skip with Minnie, somebody else has to play the part by wearing a Minnie costume.”
Wayne finally agreed Santa is a great *character* played by many people wearing the costume. And maybe it’s just better not to ask who’s wearing the suit, after all.
Jim Mitchem
Dec 21, 2009
Weird how time ebbs and flows ain’t it? 😉
Jim Mitchem
Dec 21, 2009
I agree. I was a huge Santa proponent growing up. I really believed. When i found out, I was kind of devastated – more because I felt my parents pulled a really good one on me. So basically I’m trying to make Santa so big and marvelous that when our kids do find out – they’ll still believe. And of course that will backfire and they’ll hate me forever, but it’s a risk I’m willing to make right now.
Rebecca McCormick
Dec 21, 2009
And that’s why we *always* read The Polar Express…every year!
Molly Cantrell-Kraig
Dec 24, 2009
When my kids passed the Threshold, I let them know that they were in on a bigger secret: *they* were Santa. We’d perform random acts of kindness throughout the season (usually ones the girls thought up themselves), and call ourselves “Santa.”
Then their eyes *really* lit up – when they saw the impact their actions made on the lives of others.
Merry Christmas, Jim.
Amy Flanagan
Dec 24, 2009
I think believing in Santa is important for kids because we all have to start this life believing in magic. I hope that belief in magic and the belief that strangers can perform great acts of generosity to improve the lives of others will become ingrained in my children’s souls by the time they stop believing in Santa. We have an 8 and a 9 year old. This may be their last year, but when they do find out the great truth I hope to replace their childhood innocence with a sense of responsibility to perform magic themselves and perform great acts of generosity to improve the lives of others.
Thanks for a great year of writing, Smasho. I hope you have the merriest of holidays and the happiest 2010 possible.
Jim Mitchem
Dec 24, 2009
I think that’s exactly what we’re going to do. Thanks Molly. Merry Christmas.
Jim Mitchem
Dec 24, 2009
We keep trying to explain the idea that giving is better than receiving, but I think until they reach a certain age – this concept is lost on the lights, presents and man in red. Which I’m perfectly fine with – as long as the true meaning of kindness and generosity is not lost completely. And thank you Amy for being a part of my life this past year. Relationships like this are what make social media worth sticking with. Merry Christmas.
Jeanne Veillette Bowerman
Dec 25, 2009
I always told my children Santa represents the spirit of Christmas, being very careful how I described him so as not to ever hear, “WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME!?”
When my girl was in 5th grade, she confronted me while wrapping presents. “Mom, is there really a Santa Claus?” I recite my standard line that he is a representative figure, blah, blah… She stares me dead in the eye, “Mom… does a fat man in a red suit REALLY come down our chimney and bring us presents?” I stall, sweat beading on my forehead… the moment is here… the moment I have dreaded… oh God, I have to crush my girl’s heart.
I hesitate a moment too long. Tears start to form in her eyes… and mine. She finally breaks the silence, “Mom, you can’t lie to me… I TRUST YOU!”
Knife through my heart.
“Honey, no, there is no fat man who comes down our chimney.”
I cry the same cry I did as child when my heart was broken over the loss of the magic. My girl cried too. She crawled in my lap, and we wrapped our arms around each other. Tears flowed.
That same year, Polar Express came out in the theaters. I was nervous taking her, but at the end of the film, she turned to me, whispered in my ear, “I believe.”
The magic was restored.
Jim Mitchem
Dec 28, 2009
Thanks for that sharing this story Jeanne. Moving. I hope I can muster the same honesty and empathy when the time comes. Merry Christmas.
My novel – Minor King
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